I am a rubbish blogger. I really am. Really.
Although its been over 2 months, 147 spam comments later and I still dont have very much to say. I’ve now got that nagging feeling that I need to update wordpress, but having to do it all manually really will test my patience. I’d rather watch Gladiators.
Trying to think back about what I’ve done, and whats been going on doesn’t amount too much. Theres only one thing clogging up my memory. WORK. All it feels like I’m doing at the moment is working or on my way to work. Its not too bad in itself, other than mind numbingly boring. Its not fun getting verbally abused all day everyday, how I love my mute button. One good thing is that now, well as of August 4th, I will almost be paid a decent wage, and will somewhat half justify the grief.
Its only taken 2 years but BT have finally seen the light at the end of the tunnel and have given me a permanent contract. 3 stages later, weeks of being kept waiting around and endless pointless questions, all so someone high up in BT can confirm I’m the right candidate for the job. Not that the last 2 years of doing the job might have been a blatent clue. Other than the money, its a few days extra holiday and more job security oh, and I get a company email address. For BT use only, not office jokes. Naturally. I sound narky about it but I am happy about it. Relieved. Roll on my August pay packet.
I am going on holiday in three weeks with JR. I am so excited, its been over a year and a half since our last holiday. We are off to Turkey for a week. We’re going on the 10th and come back on the 18th so I’ll be there for my 21st. I didn’t fancy a big party, and I know my mum was secretly trying to plan one, I didn’t want to scupper her plans but it just all happened that way. This deal that we’ve got with Thompson for the holiday is the best deal we could find. Originally the plan was to go to Disneyland Paris, but a 4 day 3 night trip was proving to be waaaaay more expensive than either of us had anticipated and for almost the same price we could go somewhere hotter for longer. Logic prevails. I’m hoping disneyland is still on the cards, just not right now. So after some other ridiculous holiday quotes we booked the Turkey one and that was the only date available. I get back early the day after my actual birthday so Ill kind of get two birthdays 
Meal and drinks when I get back is on my list of things to sort out. I’m not all that good at planning big get togethers, wish me luck.
The only other thing I have planned for this week is a driving lesson on Wednesday afternoon. I’ve got week off as I had leave to use up before my contract changes. I completely forgot I’d booked it until 2 weeks ago and I still haven’t managed to plan anything for it. I had a nice suprise on friday evening after JR picked me up from work. He managed to book almost all of the week off to spend some time with me and he’d kept it secret. Hes cute. Its one of the things I love about JR, hes all for suprises. Well at least he tries. The suprises are real nice but hes rubbish at keeping it to himself. A tease if anything, because he’ll only tell me half a story, and then keep me guessing. Or he’ll text me saying hes just leaving, or stuck in traffic and then two minutes later hes at the door. When he wants to be hes quite a romantic guy, and I count myself lucky.
Back to the driving lesson. I am so sick of having lessons now. I actually dread lessons, because of the full time hours I work now, I have to squeeze lessons in after work. I’m already tired by this point and I have little to zero patience with myself. I’m quite childish in that respect because if I do something wrong or not quite right then I admit - I strop. It takes me a long time to snap out of it, I’m lucky that my driving instructor is pretty laid back. He just laughs at me. Its frustrating now because I know I’m at that point where I know what to do. I failed my first test, trying to justify it - I didn’t get any major faults or any serious ones just too many minors. Thats frustrating in itself but I’m not that suprised because if I look back at my driving compared to how it is now only a month later, then its obvious. Knowing that I can easily see the difference is also helping my confidence. I know I can drive. I’m not completely filled with confidence, going in with a big head isn’t always good but I’ve re-booked my test. I’m trying not to get ahead of myself and I’m keeping it secret, even from here because JR reads this. 
to JR.
It seems that the last few weeks I’ve just had so many outgoings that its been hard to actually do anything that JR and I would do normally. We almost always go out for dinner, but this last month we’ve not been able to do anything. Macdonalds doesnt count. The only thing we have managed to do is the cinema. Lots. JR and I are right film whores. I think the cinema is such a rip off though, ticket prices where I live are a joke, £7 per adult for one film. Our local cinema is a Cineworld, and for £11.99 a month they do an unlimited film pass which is exactly as the title suggests. We signed up for one each last month and have made sure we get our moneys worth. In the last 4 weeks we have seen, Wanted, Narnia, Kung Fu Panda, Indiana Jones, Hancock, and tomorrow we are off to see Forbidden Kingdom. Out of all those films my favourite by far was Narnia. I thought the film was fantastic!! I really think that without a doubt that Dark Knight will beat it hands down. The other film we are going to see is Wall-E. I’m all for taking my 5 year old brother to see it, but after some of the reviews we’ve heard about it being a bit slow and boring for children, I’m not so sure. Lets just say my brother isn’t the most patient little boy.
God I’m boring.
I am beginning to get to grips with this theme now, a few more tweaks with it and then I can start adding proper stuff, and actually implement some customorising. I’m so tired I’m not ever sure that customorising is even an actual word.
I haven’t written properly in here for a very long time. Lately I have had a lot of things going on and the last thing I wanted to do was write it all down here in black and white for me or anyone else to see, because that would have made everything seem real. I’m not too sure I could face up to that. I don’t really think I can now but I need to be strong. He needs me to be strong.
Im soooooooo fucked off. I just wrote a massive entry, that I have had to overcome tears to write, and stupid wordpress lost it.
